In the midst of the uproar over Obama’s alleged “indoctrination” speech next week aimed at school children, conservative parents have been mulling over ideas for an alternative activity for their children to participate in. Ideas being tossed around include showing Sarah Palin’s speech from the Republican National Convention and having the children read and [...]

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Keeping with his school children theme, Obama is expected to sign an executive order changing some of the lines in the Pledge or Allegiance. This is designed to coincide with his video message to students and will be among the items handed out. Various celebrities will be recorded reciting the new pledge in [...]

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The spirit of late Senator Ted Kennedy is set to make a speech in front of a joint legislative meeting when congress returns from recess. The speech is rumored to include how it was his dying wish to see healthcare reform passed by the end of the year. No one is certain what [...]

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When TVA recently announced they were planning to place the first new mPower reactors at the Clinch River site near Oak Ridge, they never expected protesters to organize so quickly. Within three hours of the announcements, groups of old guys with big hair and black leather assembled near the proposed location, holding “No Nukes” [...]

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It appears that race for the next Sheriff of Knox County may be getting a little confusing for voters. Complaints have been coming in since Jimmie Walker, better known as J.J. Evans was seen over the weekend on a repeat of the Chelsea Handler show. “Until I saw the show, I thought I was voting [...]

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In a unanimous decision today, the Supreme Court ruled 9-0 that “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.”
In another case, the Court refused to hear Belgium’s claim that American horse meat is way better than other horse meat. US horse meat factories will now have to switch to ass meat, which is a bit [...]

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Just last week, Hillary Clinton sited the assassination of Robert F. Kennedy as a reason to stay in the race. Over the weekend, during a lull in campaigning activities, Hillary had an opportunity to see “I Am Legend” with Will Smith and realized that the death of her opponent isn’t the only thing she can [...]

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There has been much speculation as to whether the Democrats will assemble a Dream Ticket consisting of Obama for President and Clinton for Vice-President. Roving Knoxpatch reporters have uncovered a far more interesting rumor, a rumor so fresh it hasn’t even received Flashing Siren treatment on the Drudge Report.
Insiders close to both candidates have [...]

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