Janitors within Union County school system forced to work without brooms


Due to the common link between witches and brooms, the Union County school system has taken all brooms away from the cleaning staff.

According to school officials, other cleaning items were initially considered, but had various drawbacks. Dustbusters, for example, gave the appearance of a New-Age Pagan, making the dirt disappear as if by “magic” and were not suitable.

Students now must walk around in white socks to assist in keeping the floors clean. The white socks are helpful in keeping dirt from building up. They also assist in keeping non-christians out of the schools. Twice per day a “sock-check” is held, any student without a layer of dirt build-up on his/her sock is clearly a witch and can be expelled immediately.