NASA announced earlier today that the Space Shuttle Endeavour cannot be made safe for a return flight home, and will be left in orbit indefinitely. “An emergency mission has been scheduled for October to place a series of cinder blocks underneath the disable shuttled,” says Mission Control PR spokesperson Bubba Spacely. “I’ve had my ’87 Oldsmobile on blocks since 1994, and it hasn’t damaged anything yet. We’re pretty sure this will work.”