Tennessee environmental officials find good use for mercury-laden fish

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The Environment and Conservation Department, teaming with sweatshops in China, have found a suitable use for the mercury-laden fish swimming in Tennessee rivers. Through a unique partnership, Chinese manufacturers are to begin sending cheaply made thermometers adapted for the insertion of a small fish in place of the standard compound typically used. The new thermometers are expected to be within a degree of matching accuracy of other competitive products. Due to the odd smell, however, they will only be available at Dollar General Stores.

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