Madonna to convert to Southern Baptist


After her recent trip to Israel, Madonna has decided that Kabbalah and Judaism are just not for her. “I’ve tried being a Catholic, a Jew, a Hindu, Taoist, Maoist, and Buddhist. Nothing makes me feel complete, even with all this money,” she explained. “Now that I am dating Jesus, it only makes sense for me to become a Southern Baptist.” She is scheduled for Baptism next Sunday.