In a U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service (INS) report made public last week, a Martian is said to have landed in the Fort Sanders neighborhood sometime last fall. However, not many people noticed because he fit in completely with the other residents. He apparently rented a room in a house on Laurel Avenue and was famous for throwing “really good keggers.” According to another resident of the house, Bobby Jones, “Steve was a great guy, really cool. I can’t believe he was a Martian, dude. Well, now that you mention it, he was sort of strange…almost…alien!” The INS report further stated that agents deported Steve the Martian just before Christmas.