At this time last year Knoxpatch.com reported on several proposed patches to the University of Tennessee budget, including pay toilets. Once again, as the new fiscal year rolls around, the University of Tennessee finds itself in a budget crisis and needing to save another $40 million.

Roving Knoxpatch.com reporters have found a list of proposed cost-saving actions from the recent Board of Trustees meeting that are supposed to ensure a healthy 2003/2004 year for The University of Tennessee. At least we assume they were from the Board of Trustees meeting, the kids that gave us the list promise that it’s authentic.

Specific recommendations include:

  • Only paying the President if he actually does something (expected savings of 3/4 million per year).
  • Charging students extra for the privilege of paying tuition if they do so with credit cards.
  • Allowing employees to park without paying the University $26/month. Expected efficiency increase of 300% by showing respect to employees.
  • Offering students answers to all tests with a 75%/class surcharge.
  • Raising tuition for the 10th straight year.
  • Requiring students to bring their own desks to class.

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