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Day: December 10, 2004

President buys 1,000,000 George W. Bush masks

Posted on December 10, 2004 by Bjorn Knoxley

Stinging from the loss of the first Presidential debate of the election, George W. Bush has changed strategies after receiving a bit of important information. Statistics show that Halloween mask sales have accurately determined every election since Ronald Reagan defeated Jimmy Carter in 1980. Therefore, logic dictates, that a win in November is guaranteed if…

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Kerry supporter steals own yard sign

Posted on December 10, 2004 by Bjorn Knoxley

West Knoxvillian, Amy Styles, has been charged for defacing her own property and malicious mischief for stealing Kerry campaign signs…from her own front yard. Upon receiving her fifth complaint about Republicans stealing her signs the Knoxville Police Department performed an overnight stakeout to teach someone a lesson. What they saw was that Ms. Styles conscience…

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