Smurf infestation nearly closes popular downtown eatery

TENNESSEE (KP) – Oodles, owned by embattled entrepreneur Scott West, has failed a recent health inspection due to a massive Smurf infestation.

According to Oodles Chef, Bruce Bogartz, it has been impossible to get the Smurfs out of the building. “They are simply drawn to the mushrooms that Scott was growing in the back room. First we saw a couple of them…they were suddenly everywhere. A mushroom field of this size is like a giant Smurf condo.”

Being shy creatures, it was nearly impossible to reach any Smurfs for comment. Only Papa Smurf would go on record, with this comment. “If you want to help downtown Knoxville, get out and have a drink or something to eat at Oodles or Preservation Pub. Now, leave me the Smurf alone!”