After weeks of hoopla surrounding Sarah Palin’s planned visit to Tennessee, a simple mix-up led her in the wrong direction. Expected at the Tennessee Valley Fair, she showed up today at Tennessee Valley Farms. Although she was unable to meet with supporters, she still had the opportunity to have animals lick her hands, so she…
Category: Knoxville
Knoxville proper: downtown, the county, and every ribbon cutting in between.
Witnesses spot Sarah Palin blowing smoke on Market Square
This is a special news alert!  Several witnesses contacted our tip hotline today to report seeing Sarah Palin on Market Square earlier this morning. She wandered through Krutch Park and admired the other sculptures. She was overheard blowing smoke about this evening’s scheduled stop at the Tennessee Valley Fair.
The Gold Man planning his own “Swagfest”
Hoping to cash in on the meme scheme, Knoxville’s Gold Man, who likes to remain anonymous, is planning his own “Goldfest,” to also be held at the Sunsphere and Convention Center. The date has yet to be determined. The Gold Man, made (locally) famous by his Brimily’s Gold Exchange commercials, feels he should be at…
Palin promises big announcement at Tennessee Valley Fair, bringing Color Me Badd
As announced earlier, Sarah Palin plans to take the stage at the Tennessee Valley Fair on September 16. Her visit has been met with a bit of controversy because it forces the cancellation of a planned concert by Boyz II Men. Today, we received notice that a big announcement can be expected that night, and…
Sign of the times, local Merry Maids rebrands as UnMerry Maids
Owners say it’s just a sign of the times, a way to fit the needs of a modern world. The Knoxville franchise of Merry Maids is undergoing a rebranding to a more suitable ‘UnMerry Maids’ philosophy. “It’s pretty simple. In today’s economy, those that can afford help, don’t want to talk to the help,” explains…
UT Knoxville dedicates new College of Pharmacy building
The University of Tennessee dedicated the new College of Pharmacy building, located at 4624 Rutledge Pike today. What was thought to be a Police escort for the UT President who was speaking at the event, was actually a drug bust. Turns out students were selling illegally brewed drugs out of the new building. When interviewed,…
Local church and Moonshine Distillery team up with the Salvation Army
The most unlikely of trios is teaming up to fight the growing problem of the homeless in the downtown/old city area. “If you have ever walked through the Old City, you have more than likely been stopped and asked for money by a homeless person,” states John Baptist, “And you just know when they say…
Nominations now open – East Tennessee’s Least Relevant
Nominations are now open for something that truly matters. We want to determine what, in Knoxville, truly is irrelevant. East Tennessee’s Best…someone else has that under control. Now’s your chance to be heard, make your nominations today for East Tennessee’s Least Relevant for 2011. Nominations will close on September 16, with an official run-off of…
UT Athletic Department News
The assistant secretary to the associate soccer coach tripped over a power cord on her way to the water cooler yesterday afternoon, just as a volcano erupted in Yellowstone and blew the country in half. Witnesses report she stumbled slightly but was able to correct herself, and proceeded to refill her cup with fresh, cool…
As U.S. cities adapt to climate change, residents selected for North Knoxville dome city
Cities across the United States are making plans for adapting to climate change. At the forefront of plans, the City of Knoxville has announced plans for a dome that will cover Historic Old North Knoxville. The placement of the dome was selected due to the historic nature of the structures in the region. The biggest…
Green Acres Flea Market learns from Turkey Creek Public Market
Green Acres Flea Market has announced that they will no longer be described as a ‘Flea Market.’ “Our vendors have struggled over the last few months,” says the owner. “Then, along comes the Turkey Creek Public Market, and people flock to it. It’s crap in a barn, just like we have. Therefore, we’re changing our…
Palin announces visit to Tennessee Valley Fair, replaces Boyz II Men
With a better-than-expected reception at the Iowa State Fair, Sarah Palin has announced plans to visit fairs across the United States as the summer winds down. Palin denied speculation that the state fair tour was a precursor to a Presidential campaign, “That’s ridiculous,” Palin said. “I just like it when all the farm animals lick…
Flea Fancy magazine ranks Knoxville most flea friendly city in Southeast
Flea Fancy magazine ranks Knoxville most flea friendly city in Southeast. According to a release, the magazine, cites the fact that Knoxville is so darn dog friendly. The city has a multitude of activities and organizations that are tailored to providing fleas with a buffet of choices. Specifically, the magazine cites the fact that Knoxville…
World’s Fair Park geysers rebranded as ‘World’s Largest Bidet’ to spur tourism
In order to boost tourism revenues, World’s Fair Park will be rebranding the popular geysers as the ‘World’s Largest Bidet.’ Although the attraction will still be open to the general public, the health department is urging that those that still wish to let children play in the water limit exposure to 15-minute increments.
City tackles growing rat problem with help from KARM
Rat infestation is a problem in every city, and has become increasingly apparent in Knoxville. As a way to combat the problem, the City of Knoxville has developed a new publication, ‘100 Ways to Eat a Rat,’ which is being dispersed solely at Knoxville Area Rescue Ministries. KARM will, in turn, provide .10 for each…